A JOURNEY THROUGH THE WILDERNESS

If you try to argue the fact that I was born with a silver spoon, I could also not hesitate to tell you that I was well fed when I was brought into this world by my parents. Growing up as a child was so fun and loving for my siblings and I. We had everything we wanted even before we requested for them. We never felt inferior in school or anywhere we found ourselves with our age mates. My dad was an oil worker with a popular oil company ‘’Texaco’’, and my mum was a great fashionista and a banker in the coal city of Nigeria. We had house helps that took care of us, they usually incur the wrath of my mum whenever they manhandle us and we report them (am sure you get what I mean by thatJ). We had a private driver who took us on school runs and anywhere we wanted to go after school. We enjoyed good food made by my aunty (mum’s sister) specially employed to cook for us and of course well prepared lunch packs for school breaks.

 We had everything going well for us until March 1997 when the bank my mum worked for (ACB) got distressed and went under thereby leaving all the staff members’ jobless. My mum did not really feel the impact of this unfortunate development as she still had my dad to lean on, so life continued normally.  Shortly after the March event my dad’s company (Texaco) was to merge with chevron and information got to him that so many Texaco staff would be retrenched after the merger, and if anyone wanted to resign honourably a handsome reward of compounding 6 digits awaits the person. In June that same year 1997 after due consultation with my mum and my siblings like we have always done right from childhood, my dad went back to Port-Harcourt and resigned. He resigned as a chief regional accountant and of course he did not come back home empty handed, he sure got the reward for the years he had invested in the company. At this stage my parents were out of jobs but there was no form of tension at all. My dad still had some savings and the ‘’6 digit’’ paid to him on resignation. He got us a new bus for school runs and dashed someone the other family car. He got a second car for my mum, in fact we never knew life could be sweeter coupled with the bonding and love that was on the increase in our home.

After our morning prayers on a particular day in August 1997 my dad told us he was going back to port- Harcourt to seek for investment opportunities as agreed with my mum. He left the next day and did not come back for a month though he was keeping in touch. When it got to the 2^nd month my mum became really worried and we all started begging him to come back home. In order not to take you on a long journey, my ,mum got to find out that my dad had been duped of every kobo he had as a result of some fake fertilizer business his good friend took him into, and this is where my story begins......

The moment my dad found out he was duped he lost himself instantly, having lost all he ever toiled for in life in one day to some stranger he couldn’t even trace again even though he was introduced to him by a dear friend (dear friend indeed!).  We encouraged my dad to come back home to us while my mum began to make some wise woman moves with the little she saved from my dad and the bank. In 1999 she started going to Dubai to bring in gold and clothing for sale. Being a ‘fashionista’ and having made a lot of friends and acquaintances in the bank, she excelled in the business, but we were still very young then with my elder sister and first born being 16 and in her senior secondary class 2, the rest of us where 14, 12, 10, and 8years old so my mum had some bills to run with her proceeds such as school fees, housekeeping, and general maintenance.  In 2001 the bills began to eat deeply into her business until she almost lost her capital as my elder sister was already in the university and I was just doing my registration at Uni with my brother then. The bills where all flooding in at the same time (I don’t need to tell you that there were no more house helps and drivers as we had to do it all by ourselves). At this point she diverted into a new line of business introduced to her by her friend Mrs Okonkwo. She started travelling to Cotonou to bring in frozen Chicken and turkey. She sold from home and most of her friends became her customer. After few trips, she managed to get a shop at artisan Market where she also bought some second hand deep freezers to put the chicken and turkey with a medium size table, big knife/ machete, and an axe to cut the chickens for any customer that requested for it. At this point life became so horrible for us as we had to take turns to help out in the shop. Most of our friends left us or withdrew from us then probably because we didn’t measure up to status quo again (all thanks to God because this made us  stronger) as we became butchers in the market all to make ends meet.  Giving this a second thought, we didn’t have any choice as this was our only source of income. Aside from taking turns in the shop, in 2002 we began to make the trips to get the chickens from Cotonou ourselves.My younger brother and I had a large chunk of this experience as we both attend Uni in Enugu. I was 16 then and my Brother was 14, my elder sister also took turns whenever she is around. We all made the trip in turns, my mum will change thousands of naira into Cefas and we boarded  night buses to Lagos with a detailed guideline on the next step to take when we get to Lagos (Do not scream, this is no child abuse as you may wish to call it, it is called maturity!). Though we were still teenagers then but we looked so big and mature in mind that you won’t believe our age when we tell you; thus my mum took advantage of our maturity and I guess God deposited that in us for rainy days such as those days. Besides we had no choice as our dad had taken ill seriously and my mum joggled between the business and his medical treatment so we had to make ends meet. She would also let you know that the money you are travelling with is all we have and if it is lost, you have lost your future lols, Oh what a strong woman!! I really envy your inner strength.

I could flash back to the very day my brother was returning from the business trip and his bus was attacked by armed robbers. As he narrated when they asked him to lie down inside a bush in the middle of the night he had to beg for his life as the bush was so thick and he didn’t know if there were snakes there. He told them with a shaky voice that he is just an innocent boy who went to Cotonou to buy chicken and turkey to help himself and his siblings. We had so many horrible and unusual experiences until my dad died on 8^th June 2003 as a result of his illness. At this point again the then President of Nigeria Obasanjo had banned importation of frozen foods. We had my dad’s burial to plan and at the same time we were almost out of business as a result of the ban. 

We managed to give my dad a befitting burial while my mum tried her best to use every link she had to still get in some chicken but this didn’t last for long as the gaps were all discovered and bridged by the government. Hummm! We had nowhere to turn to and my mum cannot take up a profession in begging which wouldn’t have been the best option anyways. So in 2004 she went back to the same secondary school we attended and started selling ice cream of which my kid brother and sister accompanied her (yes things got that bad!) Thank God for her strength, she never gives up, her slogan has always been ‘’once there is life, there is always a way out’’.  She hawked ice cream for over a year during the breaks under the hot / scotching sun where she developed some balls around her eyes that became a torn in her flesh until 2006 when she got a part time lecturing appointment with Institute of Management and Technology (IMT) Enugu after so many nights of praying and even fasting asking God to take us back to our good old days. We always believed in miracles but didn’t know when it was going to happen. The part time lecturing Job was not paying as it was not salary based. You have to write your own journals and sell to students. Thank God my dad prepared her and helped her obtain masters in Business Administration immediately she left the bank in 1997 and proceeded for her PhD. She had to strive so hard to make ends meet by keeping awake in the night, studying and writing. I guess we preferred this one than the humiliating experiences of the past.  The pressure on her was a little bit reduced as my elder sister and I were out of school and on youth service. While we were on youth service we tried our best to send things home no matter how small, we both contributed. In 2007 we finished our youth service and thankfully got dream Jobs. My immediate younger brother went for service as well but before then got a job in Enugu so my mum's burden had reduced as she was only left with my 2 younger ones even as we supported here and there to make sure she doesn’t go back to our school to sell ice cream.

Finally in 2008 a good friend of hers who had some government connection at that time helped her earn some favour from the new government. She was given an appointment at ESUT and on that very day, I got the most exciting call I have received in the past 9years, my God, I could hear my kid sister screaming on the background ‘’Mummy has gotten a job, thank God’’. She started the Job at ESUT and the light began to get brighter and brighter. 2009 my elder sister got married, my brother got and changed jobs in Enugu and my younger ones were in their 2^nd year in the University. Today she has produced 4 graduates and a medical doctor in the pipeline that would burst in a year time.

Through it all we learnt to put our trust in God, and depend upon his word. Every day after a long hard day with all sorts of challenges we always had the opportunity to pour out before God, we grew to love God more than a miracle, we wanted him more than a break through to the extent that if he didn’t do more he would have done enough for while we were yet sinners Christ died for us. I don’t know about you but i find it hard to say this words because he truly has been a shelter, a sanctuary from the storm day by day, it’s not just a story we read in books we have seen it in our lives. What shall we render to God for all his benefits? We will lift up the cup of our salvation in the assembly of the brethren. Oh magnify the Lord with us, let us exalt his name together for we sort the Lord and he answered, this woman (my mum) cried unto God and he answered. What then shall we say of these things? What shall separate us from the love of this God? Shall trials or persecutions?, in all this things we are more than conquerors because our trials only came to make us strong.

Mummy, its true God has so much elevated you that you almost do not need anything from us rather you seek an opportunity to lavish on us, but we owe you a great deal. I want to say thank you for dropping your fashion, your friends whom you have gained back today (friends of good times), your car, your cloths, your skin, your glow! You are an incredible mom and until your last breathe we would always be grateful. I dedicate this story to you on your special day, happy birthday Mom!.

A deep heartfelt thank you goes out to all our friends and extended family members who stood by us all through the journey. Just in case you are going through something right now perhaps similar, i just want to encourage you. God cannot bring to you that which you do not have the grace to handle. Trials only come to the great and they always make you stronger than you were. Be encouraged, don’t give up, and hold your head up high.